Why Are Funerals Important to Capture?
By: Miranda Faye Dillon
Extended family coming together is always a blessing— especially during this overly-challenging year when those moments are few and far between.
Memories compiled over generations, long lost cousins coming out of the woodwork, emotionally-grappling the same pain from losing a loved one— funerals may seem odd to memorialize. But isn’t that the point of a funeral? To honor a person who no longer walks next to us, no longer shares a laugh over a cup of tea, no longer lights up a room with their jokes. Except that they are lighting up a room— by bringing together friends and family from places all over, connecting them based on shared grief.
At Just Digitize and Gibby Visuals, we aim to capture the communal commiseration of a loved one as a way to show what, and who, they left behind.
Losing a grandparent, parent, sister, cousin, or friend is never easy. With a funeral comes a rush of emotions that may never fully heal.
Memories of the person no longer with us are what make and break us. They are what make us crumble from crippling sadness at the recognition that no more memories can be made. They are what make us whole just by appreciation that we have such strong tethers to hold in our hearts.
A funeral is a way to harness the collective memories of the person who has escaped earth in physicality but not spirituality. The memory of the person is sustained by people they have touched, by family members, by friends and co-workers, and even sometimes strangers.
So…why film a funeral?
Perhaps as a way of remembering the faces that came together to celebrate the life of the special person who has passed on. Perhaps to be reminded of how young the greatest grandson was. Or to remember that even family members who had a complicated relationship with the deceased came that day to remember the good times.
Maybe after some of the grieving stages have occurred, the family would like to re-visit that day, not out of sadness per se but out of deference. Out of appreciation. Out of love and respect and gratitude. To remind themselves of the memories Great Aunt Susan spoke about, or to simply be cognizant that life is fleeting.
Twenty years down the line, a filmed funeral is a way to look back on that preserved celebration, a way to remind yourself and your family of who showed up for the deceased and who showed up as a support system to those who lost someone who held space in their hearts.
We don’t always get a chance to say good bye.
We’re almost never ready for death to take a loved one away.
But we hope that the memories can hold us until we meet with them again.
